Don't Mess with Texans

You know something that really grinds my gears: its meeting new people who think they already know me, either because they are from Texas, have been to Texas, or can spell it.

Case in point: in the last 2 weeks, i have found myself at events where i am casually seated next to or have a conversation with a stranger, and the conversation oddly enough, has progressed just like this:

"Hi, I'm so and so."
"I'm Linda, how do you do?"
"Great. So where are you from?"
"I'm from Texas."
"Oh! Texas! Which city?"
"It's a tiny little town in the middle of nowhere. I'm sure you have never heard of it."
"Houston?"

Granted - Texas is an enormous place, and the natives penchant for tall tales and the everything-is-really-bigger-in-Texas punchline is taken very seriously. But Houston is HUGE by Texas standards, is not a small town, nor in the middle of nowhere. On the map above, it would be located in the country of Austria - and as point of fact, probably bigger than Austria too.

But here is my beef: Texans are a very proud people. We are so proud of being Texan, that we very rarely admit that we are in fact, American too.

But at least no one gets onto me for my accent. Being raised in a bicultural family, there was little chance i was ever going to develop a serious one. But i know what it sounds like, and when i hear it - its honestly like music to my ears. Just like spanish spoken from a Latin American (not Mexican tho - the accent is different) it just makes me want to listen, and i can easily fall into a trance. And i have been asked to mimic it on occasion - like i was a parrot. I do entertain, but usually for money, or for my own sordid amusement. So its hit or miss whether or not i will actually do it.

But i digress - i know these people are just trying to find a commonality with me. Some way to pass the time with pleasant small talk that are as light as the bubbles in our champagne. Words that have no weight or presence, nor staying power, to float above our heads and swirl away into the night sky. I find myself in the most beautiful and scenic of places, with crowds of people whirling about me, all of us drunk on company, or booze. And i have to rehash the same chat about being from Texas. 

No I'm not from Houston. Or Dallas. Or Austin. I'm from the middle of Nowhere... and its my own private place where my family and favorite childhood memories live. It's called Lorena, and being small in population does not in any way diminish its importance to me. 

More hilarious maps of Texas - all hail the mighty state!  :)